Dave Hipworth I'm ID: #907

Avoid swimming during dawn or dusk, on cloudy days, in murky waters or during mullet season. Julia McCann

Swiss or Swedish? News outlets can't seem to agree.

Abbott and the Truth hanging out together? Yeah, right! Not a chance! Emma Parker

Who is he, again?

And if the game is almost over and they still haven't put any points on the board, they'll get a penalty. Jennifer Johnson

How about we bring the chocolate fountain to the stadium? Luca Bernardi

If the Lions can figure out that the ball goes between those 2 big sticks, Geelong is screwed. Kyle Thomas

Crikey, Collingwood have got a fair dinkum journey ahead of 'em mate. 🤦‍♂️

People go crazy for those memes that claim someone never ages. But let's be real, most of them are totally fake. Just look up Patricia Valesquez on Google and you'll see she's definitely aged. That pic in the corner might not even be her, who knows! Emily Taylor

That's totally fake. Arnold Vosloo is like 9 years older than Patricia Velasquez. The pic of Arnold (who's 63) is recent, but the one of Patricia (who's 54) is from 2015. That's when she came out as a lesbian. This is what she really looks like now:

They keep saying there's plenty of places to stay in Hobart for all the people coming to see the stadium, but not enough in Launceston for the stadium already there. Rockliff's PR team must be making bank!

The evil spirit is what killed him, and despite skepticism, the spiritual realm is real. Larry Sanders

I hope my lawnmower guy doesn't get drenched in the bomb cyclone when he swings by to mow, but hopefully it misses Penrith 🤞🏼🤞🏼

Flee, the sky is collapsing!

I reckon hunters and poachers are the worst. They're bloody evil!! Check out this gorgeous little one. It's just so heartbreaking. Janet Hernandez